I fuckin know what to do.. what's right to do.. what's best to do.. I just don't know how to do it. You effing don't know how hard it is to resist doing something wrong and you awfully know it. It's easy for you to just JUDGE without even knowing what's up with me. What the hell is happening.. what shit I'm dipped into.. what the fuck is happening... YOU GUYS HAVE NO CLUE. :| Yes. You do have a hint. but for me to smack your face with this.. YOU DON'T HAVE THE SLIGHTEST CLUE HOW IT FEELS. :| Don't you go kidding me that this is another EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN of mine. Everyone's going through a lot of pain lately.. and yes, WE ALL FEEL CRAP LATELY. :| I know. WE ALL DO. :| But if that's the case, WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE ALWAYS ME? ME EQUALS THE JOKE TIME OF EVERYONE. What the fuck? Do I look bad? Bad enough for you to spill fuckin comments that just hurt a lot?? that just freakin goes through my fuckin veins which I try so hard to shrug off but then the moment I lie down on my bed at night, that WORDS OF YOURS came rushing in again and it feels like it won't ever go away? DON'T YOU GO MAKE ME THE BIG JOKE. I AM NOT BORN TO BE JUST A FUCKIN JOKE. And I must state this very clearly and don't you guys ever get me wrong.. Sometimes it feels OKAY. But then more often than not, it feels CRAP. :| Why do I always have to be the one being laughed at? DO I LOOK REALLY THAT BAD??? DO I ACT REALLY THAT BAD?? I'm not giving out the "am-i-just-sensitive" option cos you just might CHOOSE it. :| Please. It hurts me. It fuckin hurts to be A BIG JOKE FOR YOU GUYS. :| I don't even make fun of you. Do you get it?? I don't have a grudge or something.. I just feel like this should all come out NOW. Not later, not tomorrow not in the near future.. but NOW. Now is the moment. :|
Guys, I try so hard to support you.. to be very cheerful when you feel down. but don't look down on me as if I'm a fuckin doormat okay?

HINDI NA NAKAKATUWA MINSAN.. BASTUSAN NA KASI EH.. NASASAKTAN DIN AKO.. KONTING RESPETO NAMAN MINSAN. KASI KAHIT KAILAN DI KO NAMAN KAYO BINASTOS DIBA?.. Pareparehas lang tayo.. wala namang hitting below the belt.. Nakikipagbiruan naman ako eh.. lumugar lang.. tsaka wag naman yung ginagawa nyo kong parang ang tanga tanga ko lang? diba.. Ginagawa nyo kong hayop o kung anu man maisip nyo tas pagtatawanan nyo ko.. seryoso.. nakakasakit eh. :(